How often do we with those that we are in relationships with especially when it has developed into a serious one such as an engagement talk about financial matters. Especially when one of the biggest reasons that couples divorce these days are due to financial matters.It is so important that when we are considering marrying someone that you have a talk to find out where their financial standings and priorities are, if you are on the same page. especially when it comes to bearing and raising a family. There was also a lot of great advice when it comes to leaving the nest and letting our children go. My favorite quote from is  “… Parents give their children two things:  roots to grow, and wings to fly. …” (Helping and Healing Our Families, page 328). As parents we have the great responsibility of rearing and raising children and then as they react the proper age letting them grow to learn and progress themselves. It is not an easy thing to do but it is one of the most important roles we will ever have in this life!

There were many key points in our reading this week. But one point that hit hard with me is the council given on what a couple is about to get married should do regarding their parents and how to start and gain a stronger marriage. President Kimball has an amazing quote that I want to share, "Frequently, people continue to cleave unto their mothers and their fathers, and their chums.Sometimes, mothers will not relinquish the hold they have had upon their children, and husbands as well as wives return to their mothers and fathers to obtain advice and counsel and to confide, whereas cleaving should be to the wife in most things, and all intimacies should be kept in great secrecy and privacy from others… Your married life should become independent of her folks and his folks.  You love them more than ever, you cherish their counsel, you appreciate their association, but you live your own lives, being governed by your decisions, by your own prayerful considerations after you have received the counsel from those who should give it (Spencer W. Kimball, March 1977 Ensign, pp. 4, 5)."

This week had so much advice and council on what it means to be chaste with your spouse or those who you date has been shared and given. We know the main basic way that individuals can cheat while married or dating and that is being with or kissing another person. But what about other ways we may be disloyal? What was brought up in our reading is having a friendship with someone of the opposite spouse and turning to them more than to who we are with. This was a very interesting and new concept, one that the more I read the more I believed! Even though it seems so innocent at first the problem is that it usually leads to things that may eventually end your relationship or your marriage!

Friendships are not bad but when they start becoming more important to you and more meaningful to you than the one that you have with your spouse, that is when a line has been crossed and damage has been done. Luckily we have the Lord to help and guide us and the Holy Ghost to warn us about getting in these situations, if only we listen!

In the two books that I am reading for my class there were so many incredible points and advice given through out my reading this week. What has stuck with me the most is the discussion that was given about seeing the good in our spouse. And since I am not married yet and turned this into seeing the good in my roommates and my friends and even siblings that I live by. When we think negatively of someone or we are angry and annoyed by another it is so easy to see their faults and the things that they do that we disapprove of. And from there it just gets worse and soon we cannot handle to be around that person let alone love them as we used to. H. Wallace Goddard, in his book Drawing Heaven Into Your Marriage, points out the the only way to beat this is to look for the positive, look for their gifts and talents and good attributes. You start to do this and you will begin to see them as you used to. You will find that you care for them again. It may sound simple but it takes a lot of work, but imagine what the pay off is. Let us all see the good in each other!

In readings that I have done this in the book, "Drawing Heaven into Your Marriage" by Wallace Goddard there is a quote from one of the chapters that I just feel in love with and have already shared with a number of people. "The Natural Man is inclined to love himself and fix others. God has asked us to do the opposite. We are to fix ourselves by repenting, and to love others." This is such a small sentence but it bring so much clarity into our lives on our actions and how we treat others as well as ourselves. We live in a world that is continually pushing us to look at what makes "us" happy and we should first look out for ourselves and then when we are satisfied and happy that is when that is taken care of then we can help other people. That is exactly how Satan wants us to be with our family's and our relationships. He wants us to think about ourselves before others and that is one of the easiest and biggest ways to disrupt the family or a marriage. Remember the first commandment. Love God and by doing so everything will fall into place when you put Him first!

I recently read a story written by, Martha Arnell called "Fishing in Alaska" it was about her experience with her husband who is a major outdoorsy guy that loves to fish and hunt. Well  her husband got an opportunity to take a trip to Alaska which is like the Disneyland of outdoors and he wanted her to go with. This was definitely not her cup of tea but she wanted to support her husband in the things that he was passionate about and loved. The story goes on and explains a few things that happened on their trip but what I want to point out or talk about is the point of supporting out spouses or even those that we love in their activities and the things that are meaningful to them. When the person that we are with has likes or activities that are different from our own it doesn't mean that the relationship is doomed to faith it just means that we both need to support the other in their hobbies whether that means being a cheerleader or join in on the activity. By doing so you are showing that they are important to you and that you are willing to invest in that relationship by giving of your time even if it is not your first choice in what you would like to be doing. Love is an action word and giving of your time for another is definitely showing that! We all need to show our love, not just say those words!